I was not expecting a huge amount of notifications that come afterwards, or the amount of questions of people who shared their bullying experience with me, and it's an overwhelming experience.
I thank each and every one of you who made the time to drop by and share your stories and support, it's been a wonderful feeling to know that I'm not alone in this thing.
See, during the time I got bullied, I never once thought that I'm not alone because when you got bullied by practically the entire school, feeling alone was the most normal thing you can feel other than pain and fear and other depressing feelings.
In all fairness, I don't really take pride on surviving bullying mostly because I think it's a natural instinct to escape a dangerous situation, and also because I did my fair share of bullying too, in a way. When I wrote about my bullying experience down on my notebook, I pour all my honest feelings into words without thinking that the book might accidentally got into the hands of the bullies. And it did, and I made a few girls cry because of what I wrote in that notebook.
This is how I dealt with the effects of bullying.
To be honest, up to this point, it still hurts to look back and to share my experience on as a victim.
And do you know how many years it had been?
Eight. Eight fucking years and I still have a hard time on dealing with it sometimes. I'd be insecure in making new friends, and I easily hold back and feel afraid that someday my current friends would leave me if I were different just like my bullies did 8 years ago.
Overcome bullying isn't easy. It takes years to feel okay. It takes a lot of failed attempts in trying to make new friends, and it takes your whole energy and your will to put your trust on someone again.
But I did. I managed to survive.
So if you're going through a bullying
experience right now, I suggest you to do these things I listed down below:
1. Tell someone. Get help.
In my case, I finally came out to my
parents and tell them about my bullying experience. I suggest you to tell your
parents/other adults such as your teachers so they can take immediate actions
regarding your situation. Or if you felt like you can't tell them directly,
tell your experience to a friend and tell them to pass it on to your parents or
teachers.
2. Telling someone doesn't mean the
bullying would stop altogether. Try searching for people who have similar problems
like you do; find other bullying victims and make friends with them. If needed,
go anywhere in groups or ask your teacher to keep an eye on you and the
bullies. Hang in there, alright? Hang in there. The bullies would want to see
you give up, so don't.
3. If it's not possible for you to do
those things I wrote above, try these things instead:
http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-Bullies
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/bullying.htm
or if you'd like to consult directly to a
fellow bullying survivor, try sending your questions/stories here:
http://ask.fm/CounterAttack8
(mild warning: the admins can be a bit
harsh sometimes, but I found their answers to be effective. I wish I had known
an account like this when I got bullied)
it's hard getting through a bullying
experience. What you should know that despite your fault, you DON'T deserve to
be treated that way. Don't feel sorry for being yourself. Take pride in
yourself, and believe that someday you'll find people who appreciate you and
your quirks. Things will get better, I promise you that. It takes time to heal,
and no one's rushing you to heal anytime soon... but you just have to remember
that wasting your life over your bullying experience isn't gonna do nicely on
yourself, so do yourself a favor:
let it go. And move on. And be greater
than your bullies. :)
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